guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Please don't give away my fajitas
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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