And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
