pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i will never coherently bang her
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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