we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
