1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
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