So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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