I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
