You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
