we made out on top of his cat.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
This couple is walking their pig around campus
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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