no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
