I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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