I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize