I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize