this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Randomize
