You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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