HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
is wine microwaveable?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize