i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
