I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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