Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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