I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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