White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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