let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
