If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
