Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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