Porn is love you can see.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
