Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
It's never too late to be topless.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize