Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
