i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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