the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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