Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
