I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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