You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
