Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Michael Bay diarrhea
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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