He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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