Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
