Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
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