My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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