I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
