She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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