Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
