I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
