She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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