My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
