oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I'm really busy with my period
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