whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Randomize