nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
