Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Your cock deserves a montage
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize