Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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