Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
