so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
